Category Archives: Pregnancy

Dear Charlotte, (week 38)

Hi baby girl! 38 weeks! It’s so surreal to be at the end of this long journey growing you inside my body. In fact, it’s surreal enough that every time I try to type 38 weeks, I inevitably type 28. Not that I’d like to back track to there… I’m too excited for that!

We are, at 38 weeks, continuing to grow although I’m not sure how much more space my body has for you and I to both occupy it. Last week, you “dropped” which has put my belly even more front and center and given me a distinctive ‘great with child’ gait as I try to get things done around work at home. Everywhere I go, everyone wants to know allll about you. It’s incredibly sweet how many people are so excited for you to come!

Your nursery is officially done and just waiting for you to come enjoy it! I’m so excited about how everything turned out, I really love the space we’ve made for you and hope you will too! Your sweet dad got my car all spic and span ready for you to come so this weekend we can put your seat in.

At this point, we’re just waiting on you, little girl. Anxiously waiting to see your little face, whose nose you have, what color your hair is, what your sweet little hands look like. Anxious to hold you and kiss you. To rock you and love you. To find out who we are as a family with you. I can’t even wrap my head around the reality of you. You, our baby and us, your parents. Sometimes, in the middle of the night, I wake up full of anxiety and wonder- how did God possibly love us enough to give us a you so easily? And is He maybe crazy? What if we aren’t enough? I hope we are. But, in those quiet and dark hours, there you are kicking me like a wild thing while Quincy tries to sleep on top of you. Those kicks are so comforting. Like you’re trying to communicate with me from in there, loving us and wondering just as much about us as we wonder about you.

Any day now, little one. We can’t wait to meet you.

 

xoxo,

Mama

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Dear Charlotte, (week 36)

Hi baby girl! 36 weeks and two days. 27 days to our due date. We are getting so close and anxious! I see my doctor every week in hopes that you’re doing something to show that you might be on your way soon. It seems like you’re currently happy in your cramped home in my belly which is just fine for now. Just don’t stay too long!

Daddy and I are finishing last things in your room- hanging pictures and arranging stuffed animals. Silly little things that won’t matter to you at all but are so much fun for us! It has been pure joy creating space for you in our house. I’m hormonal and weepy and end up crying almost every time I go in there as I think about how we are creating space in our life for you like this- getting everything as ready as we can. We’re already so in love with you, every feeling is full of missing you before we’ve met you more than anything else.

My body is starting to feel like a gigantic thing that belongs more to you than to me- you make my stomach roll when you kick and move, you love pushing your little butt up against my side so it gets as hard as a rock and you get so annoyed if we put pressure on you in any way, it ends in a series of hilarious kicks which, half of the time, digress to hiccups. You’ve been practicing breathing this way for weeks but, just in the last few days, my whole belly has started bouncing slightly with your hiccups. It is so hilarious to watch and feel!

Nearly every day, your sweet daddy holds my belly and looks a little awestruck while he says something about how exciting it is that we’re going to have a little girl to love soon! Counting down the days and weeks is getting surreal and thrilling… you could come any time and we can’t wait.

Like the song I love says

How long will you make me wait?
I don’t know how much more I can take
I missed you but I haven’t met you
Oh but I want to
How I do

xoxo

Mama

Dear Charlotte (week 34)

Hi there baby girl!

We’re less than 6 weeks away from you coming and I have become, as so many like to say, “great with child.” You are already the biggest focus of our lives- the thing we think and talk about the most, the person we love best in the world and someone we absolutely can’t wait to finally meet. So soon!

Over the last two weeks, we have had two baby showers with different groups of people to celebrate your imminent arrival. What a joy it has been to see how well loved you already are and to be reminded how loved your dad and I are! We have a great community and family- you are going to be one lucky little girl to grow up with these people.

I think you are running out of room inside of me- your kicks have changed from sudden little bumps to something that feels a little slower but much much stronger. You love sitting on my ribs- maybe they are a nice chair, I’m not sure!

Last week, while Marion was here, we got all of your newborn things- clothes and blankies and diapers- washed, unpacked, put away and ready to go for you. While we hope you stay in for a few more weeks, you could come any day and we would be ready! That is such a relief to me. While we have a lot to do for you still, we’re ready enough.

Your dad and I have started classes getting ready for you- a birthing class on Tuesday nights for the month of May and we have one baby care class next Monday. I have to confess that I’m pretty nervous about the birthing thing and am basically holding onto the belief that women live through this all of the time and when we get to it, my deep want to see you will overwhelm some of my much less important fears. Your dad, on the other hand, seems to be getting more excited after every class we go to. Just last night, as we were getting in bed and he was wishing you ‘good night, baby girl! sleep well! i love you!’ he paused in the middle to tell me ‘I’m so excited for her to get here. I can’t wait to hold my baby girl.’

As always, sweetheart, you are loved and adored. Before you even know the world exists, we love you.

 

xoxo

Mama

Dear Charlotte (week 32)

Hi, baby girl! 32 weeks and some odd days… that means just 7 weeks and a couple of days (hopefully) until we get to meet you! I know I keep saying this but we really can’t wait.

Your car seat and stroller came last week and we got them all put together. There are two things to know about this: 1) you, our unborn child, officially own the most complicated thing in our house. Your dad and I still aren’t entirely sure how to fold and unfold it with ease. We mostly think that, when it works right, it’s because of magic. 2) I breathed a huge sigh of relief once it was all put together- I’ve been secretly worrying about not having a car seat for you and how was I going to take you home if you came early?! I even had a dream a few weeks ago that you came early and I had to walk home with you. This would never happen but, apparently, it was something I was very concerned about. (I’m a weirdo, I know.)

You are getting bigger every day and, as a result, so am I! I lost sight of my feet last week, all I see now is my belly holding you.

You move around a lot and, for some unknown reason, seem to favor hanging out on the right side of my tummy. Enough, in fact, that it often looks crooked and a couple of my friends have noticed. We all think you’re hilarious with that!

I’m so glad you’re healthy and doing well in there. If you wanted to come a little early, say just after that 36 week mark, I wouldn’t mind at all! :) We’re just ready for you to be here, already!

As always, we love you. And can’t wait to meet you. Single digit weeks, little one!

xoxo

Mama

 

Dear Charlotte (week 30)

Week 30. We’re getting so close to you being here! I’m slowly reaching that point that so many moms reach- ready for you to be an outside baby I can love and take care of! And not an inside baby that kicks me all night. :)

You are getting big and it’s definitely showing in pretty much every part of my life. I’m waddling as I walk around and recently discovered I can’t reach things on the top shelf in our kitchen. I used to be able to but now you keep me too far away to reach that high!

Your nursery is painted and looks absolutely gorgeous. Now your Dad and I just have to figure out where all of the furniture best fits in your room and start decorating! It’s so fun and surreal to see your room- it makes all of these changes and kicks that I feel every day so much more real. We have a little girl and she is coming soon- this room is proof!

I think you’re going to be obsessed with ice cream when you get here. Sorry about that. It’s the only thing I ever really want on a consistent basis. Other than that, we just eat the things I like which I’m hoping will give you a really broad palette. A broad palette that loves vanilla chocolate swirl from TCBY.

A funny thing you’ve done to me is changed how I like drinks. I used to HATE anything with ice in it, especially water. I would typically much rather have water at room temp than iced. Not so, any more. Even when it’s freezing in our house (we turned off the heat a month ago), I still have a huge glass of ice water every where I go. You love ice water!

Your Dad starts a new job on Monday- we’re both very excited and nervous. One of the best parts will be that he will be home most evenings. It’s been over 4 years since we’ve had evenings together- we can’t wait for that time. And knowing you will be here before we blink, we can’t wait to have that family time together.

2 months, baby girl. We can’t wait.

love,

Mama

Dear Charlotte (week 29)

29 weeks, kicky girl! That means we have 10 weeks and 6 days until you’re due… less if you come early (please don’t come late). I can’t even wait!

Our life seems to be in a flurry getting ready for you to get here. We spent the weekend picking out paint colors for your room, registering for my baby showers and doing all of the yard work we can before you get here in hopes that we will be able to let it go a little once you arrive.

We finally settled on a color scheme for your room- pale yellow and grey. My hope is that it will be a calm and inviting place we will all enjoy spending time in. I’m pretty sure I’ve put more thought into your little room than any space I’ve ever been in before! One of the really sweet things is how excited the whole family is to be a part of this- your Grandi got us a ceiling light I wanted even though it meant going to IKEA (both the best and worst thing to have to do), the whole family has bought a ton of furniture and necessities and your great-grandparents are coming this weekend to help Dad and I paint! It’s coming together, I’m so excited! My hope is to have your space mostly done and put together by the end of this month- just in case you decide to be like your Mama and make an early appearance.

You kick me all of the time these days. I mean, ALL of the time. One of the things my doctor has me do is take a few minutes every day to count your kicks. I’m supposed to count 10 movements within 2 hours and call them if you don’t do that many. Sweetheart, you only need 5 minutes or less every time. In fact, the other day you were kicking so hard it looked like my belly was having a dance party. I love every one, they are so sweet and remind me you are there waiting to come out and be loved. Well, I love every one except for the bladder ones. If you could stop that, I’d appreciate it. ;)

We love you so much already and can’t wait to meet you. In some ways, it feels a little like missing you- I want to meet you so bad, I already miss you and wish we were together. This feeling reminds me of one of my favorite songs:

“Why are you so far from me?
In my arms is where you are to be
How long will you make me wait?
I don’t know how much more I can take
I missed you but I haven’t met you
Oh but I want to
How I do”

(To Whom It May Concern, The Civil Wars.)

I know it’s about lost love but in so many ways, it’s about me and you. Waiting to meet you. Waiting to hold you and love you. Missing you even though I haven’t met you. Loving you before you’re here and waiting patiently until we’re together.

“Dear whoever you might be, I’m still waiting patiently…”

All of my love,

Mama

Dear Charlotte (week 27)

Hi baby girl.

What a crazy couple of weeks we’ve had. It’s been my busiest time at work, our spring board meetings. That has meant a lot of time on my feet, a lot of time running around, and a ton of overtime. Just after that was over, I went on a quick trip with your Grandi and some friends- we had such a blast! I was joking with them that it was kind of a babymoon before you get here but with my mom instead of my husband. (Your dad, by the way, is awesome about those jokes and about not minding when I leave him for a weekend like that. He really is the best. We are both very lucky to have him.)

I’m starting to look very pregnant and it’s funny to see how people respond to that. I’ve gotten everything from kind offers to help me out to people trying to rub my tummy without asking to those funny things people love to say about pregnancy and just how big I’ve gotten.
The best part of my belly being this big is that it means you are getting big- over 2 pounds by now! And since you’re so big, I get to feel more that you are doing.

You continue to love 4:00 a.m. Grandi says that you will probably follow a similar schedule when you are born. I better learn an affection for that time, too!

You get the hiccups which is hilarious. It feels like you’re rhythmically bouncing around in there but running out of bouncing room.

Sometimes, when you’re going particularly crazy, I sing you funny little songs- “baby girl, in my belly, what are you doing in there? baby girl, in my belly, do you have any hair?” I didn’t say I’m a great writer. I just like songs and rhymes. Not as much as I like you, though!

xoxo

Mama